The Awful Truth....

Well....the awful truth, the truth is I have not only fallen off the 'weightloss wagon'....it's hardly even a blip on the landscape anymore!

I have taken to eating non-stop, oh yes I mean non-stop!  Cake, biscuits, chips, chocolate...anything I can get my hands on!

What the hell??  All the weight I was losing is back on ....but worse still every damned kilo has brought a couple of it's mates with it too!!  I weigh more now than I did at the start of this journey!



Depressed?  Oh yes......  

Sad?  Yes.....very......  

Unmotivated?  Well I think that goes without saying really!


So now I have had to go and buy more clothes, in a bigger size ....not happy Jan!!

My beautiful new rings!

The worst thing has been that my darling husband bought me a beautiful new wedding band and engagement ring, when we got married he always said that he'd buy me something even better when we were more financially stable.  So there I am in the jewellers a few weeks ago, dreading trying the rings on as I thought they were going to be too small....my already chubby stumpy fingers had 'grown' as the weight has piled back on....anyways, I managed to get both rings onto my fat little sausage finger....but it was VERY tight, the jeweller assured me that it was fine and was just becasue it was a different shape to my last rings.

No ....it wasn't fine.  We went in last week to drop them both off to be resized ...bigger of course!  Upside, I get to pick them up on Saturday ....yay!  Hubby did say that once my 'mojo came back' we'd be back to have them shrunk down again .....the poor woman didn't really know what to say and I certainly didn't know where to look!  

My hubby is great, he always tells me he loves me regardless and of course I believe him.....but (you knew there was going to be a 'but' didn't you?) I feel so sad about how I look that I spend hours (yes hours) whinging and moaning that nothing fits and constantly putting myself down....because ...well I'm so uphappy with myself!  He must get sick of hearing it, only once has he said that only I could change that.....whilst I know he speaks the truth, it still hurt.  I was wanting to wallow in my self pity for a bit longer.....so it kind of stopped me in my tracks lol!

So, now I'm even further from my 'goal weight' than I've ever been.  Not really ready to share my current weight with the world...I will but just not today, one step at a time...so they say!

So anyone who happens to be following or reading this blog ...let me know how you stay on track, what do you do to get back on the wagon once you've strayed?  All and any help would be more than welcome!